I grew up having an amazing life wanting for nothing. I am originally from Long Island, Manhasset, to be exact. I grew up splitting my time between Manhasset and Southampton (don't worry I'm not a spoiled brat, our house out east was my parents first house and at the current moment while still being my favorite place in the world, has a black plastic trashbag covering half the wall in the shower so the water doesn't leak through the wall and into the basement, if that gives you any idea's. Not to mention that my father replaced the mattresses two years ago for the three bedroom ranch only after careful consideration for a short TWENTY years, so I have to say it was quite an improvement moving from sleeping on a pad with coils sticking out to a mattress where I didn't wake up with fear of lead poisoning).
But back to my younger childhood where I won't boor you but I started participating in theater productions at the age of seven and became hooked. I was never a full on theater enthusiast, all theater all the time, I had friends throughout highschool in many different areas of interests. I hung out with the jocks, the dancer's (I was a dancer but let's just say my commitment was lackluster to the prima ballerina's I shared my love of the art with). I went to an all girls catholic school and I'll be honest, I loved every minute of it. The uniforms ( I still have my plaid skirt and knee socks tucked away in my closet), the craziness of not having any guys at our school - we became the guys; you know freshman year at the lunch table seeing who could EAT THE most calories before the period ended. Let's just say we were clearly not worried about our so-called labels by the other catholic school of being "heffer's". We didn't care what other people thought about our antics in school and it was great.
However, I can't talk about highschool without talking about the theater. I went over to the boy's school Chaminade my freshman year to audition for their musical "The Wiz". At the time their productions were known to be the best on the Island. I would have been happy with a role in the chorus however to my surprise I was cast in two leading roles and had a large dancing part. I was elated. I loved the rehearsals, being prepared with my music and not to mention at the end of the show they got four of the senior football players to carry me across the stage (interestingly enough, these guys who outweighed me by at least one hundred pounds were also a little bit frightened of the overly outspoken 15 year old telling them if they dropped me there would be hell to pay. And so started my career off in theater full force, although this was after years of performances it was truly my first show at Chaminade that boosted my confidence and led me to realize that no matter where life takes me, I would always be drawn back to my love of performing and full circle it has come around.
I have many more stories to tell but I will leave them for another time (my next post will be about a Little Fish in a Big Pond, when after years of being one of the best if not the best performer of my grade and throughout the catholic school system, I went to college in NYC where let's just say I was one of a million little blonde girls that could sing and dance).
So today I am on my second year post college. I lived in the city for four years and decided last spring I wanted to move home to save some money and I'll be honest, to get a little TLC from my parents after living on my own in the big apple for a while. At the moment it is 8:58 which is pretty good for me to be up and productive this morning. Last year I spent many days on the couch waiting for my manager to call me for an audition. I was completely lost. In college, performers and artists are taught their "craft", i.e. the craft of acting, singing, dancing, painting, sculpting, etc. However, something that many of us artists realize when we leave college is that these fine institutions seem to leave that little part about "THE BUSINESS" out of the curriculum. I can only say from my side being an actress I had no idea what submissions where or how to carry them out. The difference between being union vs. non-union in the event of auditions, lets just say being non-union you'll be waiting quite a few more hours then those in the union, if you get to audition at all. However, throughout all of this I did get to learn the business on my own last year and I have to say it was so much more powerful for me starting out this year. Clean slate. "It's as if I'm designing and stringing a pearl necklace. The first pearl being placed when I was seven for the first time on stage, then came moving, making new friends, going to catholic all girls school after attending public all my life. l\Not all of the pearls are perfectly round as the salt water pearls are. The saltwater marks milestones in my life common to other. The freshwater each have their own unique grooves and textures that take time to form and will not appear until something happens that can only come from inside of me marking my own uniquness. After this weekend I have a new freshwater pearl on my strand. I sang this It is part of a fundraiser for a charity that is close to my heart, Luciasangels (check us out at Luciasangels.org).
Through all these years I have been a singer but after going to school for it and being mandated to learn new music every week that I sometimes didn't like started to dampen my love for it. Especially because if the person I was singing for such as a teacher didn't like the way I sang it I would be reprimanded when I was just trying to add some of my own individuality to it. However, after rehearsing for the show and just let loose with my vocals I sang better then I have in years, if not my whole life.
Now I recently gave up drinking, I decided after a long time with it, it was something I could take in only very small doses and being twenty three a big part of the lifestyle is going out to bars. It's not to say that I've given up meeting my friends out at an occasionally party in the city somewhere but I found in order to achieve my goals I need a good night sleep and a very healthy body. So many of my nights are filled with watching TV. However, when I ROCKED OUTTTTTTTT working with Bobbie (Lucia's Sister - Our beloved friend for whom we honored by creating the organization Lucia's Angels for women and families dealing with late stage cancer) I felt free and light and happy. It was like my first kiss all over again, tingly, warm, beautiful and buzzing. I had rediscovered my love of singing but found a way to stay true to the melodies while making it my own. I realized then that I can sing folk, rock, country and so much more. With this came a pearl that had to marinate on its own finally came out to be placed on my string. I had to find it on my own otherwise if one little groove was not ready as though it was forced out of me I would not have and the reaction nor would I have done so well. The grooves represent a new piece to my life I didn't expect. I was finally open enough for it to look for me.
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